It's hot. My ankles are HUGE from the 16 hour flight. And bugs are not only trying to eat me, but are trying to crawl into our keyboards and eat our processors.
But how can any of that matter when the view outside my bedroom window looks like this:
yes, I promise you. It is really that green.
The only thing I've been able to say these past hours is 'how is this where I live?'
waiting in the Bangkok airport where the walls are glass and the sun is rising through the clouds
walking around the green green compound of the Agriculture and Theology school run by the Thai-Lahu Christian Church
inhaling curry noodles with lime and glasses of thai ice tea
getting jostled around in the backseat of a 9 seater van, touring the city to see where my classes will be, loving the stores full of clothes and open front bars
finding out that a Harvard prof will be teaching our exclusion class, and will be taking us to Burma on a field trip
'how is this where i live?'
but really, on the inside, what I really really wanna know is how could I live here? How could someone like me, afraid, selfish, and lazy, live somewhere like this. with these wonderful, wonderful people. (people like the girls who bought me cake in the terminal, and to Julia and Kenny who found tiny sweet cute things to sing to me on my birthday)
but I'm here. And because I'm re-learning what it means to trust God and what S/He says about me, I'm trying to believe that I was hand-picked to be here. From the beginning of time, I was meant to be here right now.
I don't really believe it. But I'm trying.
-I didn't come here of my own accord, and I can't leave that way.
Whoever brought me here will have to take me home.- Rumi, 'whoever brought me here'
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