money.

From Thursday to Sunday, I put in 19 hours at Isla. At 6 dollars an hour, I made $114. On top of that I made some close to $100 in tips. And then the $150 Ninong gave me.

I made all this money... but I've technically already spent it all... -_- stupid credit card. Most of it is legitimate, birthday presents and groceries... but you have NO idea how much money I have spent eating and taking people out to eat. lol, Which is also legitimate in my book.

But I'm gonna put that card away. haha. It's funny because when Ray handed me my pay and tips all I could think about what how I need to give it away, that I can't have this much money. Lol, I just already had. And it's interesting how that money FEELS different than the money I get from sitting Media Services desk or the allowance from my parents. I know that I worked for this, that we (the restaurant) worked for this. Maybe also because it's cash. I wanna start doing things in cash.

In any case, I'm using the money to pay off my credit card and start new.


I'm dead tired, my feet hurt, I've got two term papers to do, but I feel just a little bit more independent.

chasing pavements

"i want to be Love and have Love, and not just that romantic kind either."

I don't remember the last time I felt this way. I just want the romantic right now.

hahah. which is exactly why i shouldn't be in a relationship.

Because I cannot love another more than I love myself and i cannot let another person love me.

linkness.

can't write anything. catching up. too much. 

also, reading american born chinese. wish i had this growing up.

the books I read when I was young:

-what happened to lani garver- carol plum ucci

from the jfk library, before the renovation

-the giver - lois lowry

awakened my love of distopian novels

-speak- laurie halse anderson

when i was in the 8th grade, at the springstowne middle school library. it was on display, on a gray metal shelf that i had to bend down to reach. i saw it from across the room.

-feed - m.t. anderson

i still remember the party scene where the main character cannot handle the new fad of cosmetic lesions, and i get shivers when i get recommendation emails from amazon.

- the grave, james heneghan

7th grade, when the whispers first began of my 'weirdness'

things i love right now:

- make up lite: colored burt's bees wax, soft eye pencils, velvet tuberose body butter, and done eyebrows

- Amy Tan: The Kitchen God's Wife; I can't get over how much I resonate with her portrayal of the Asian Immigrant and Asian American divide

- the fact my portfolio is on its way

- glossy magazines

- watchmen

- current tv